Life is really busy and boring in its own way. The past few weeks have been really hectic as i was juggling between office, home & injuries.
After a month long dull time, things started running and exciting(not sure) at office. There is a lot for me to catch up and i have been learning new things for a while and i needed to improve these skills at a faster pace to move on. There are also a few new requirements added to my KPI list and i am trying hard to manage time to fit everything in.
I have been doing weekend trips to home as my mum wanted to play the “Great Devotee” role all of a sudden. I have no issues with her god and her prayers. But these days, she wants me to perform all sorts of pujas(prayers & rituals) to appease the planets and stars. She strongly believes that it is these planets and their moods that are causing problems with my marriage. If you have any idea about the arranged marriage scenario in India, you must have known how tensed and worried parents are when their kids stay unmarried for long. My mother, who used to be the healthiest member in the family, was diagnosed with breast cancer and underwent surgery & treatment. She is fine now and is recovering well but the incident almost broke my dad. I guess the very thought of losing her shook him from the roots. And my mum also was not the same as before. She used to be this strong, self-reliant, alpha-female like person. Surgery and the treatments that followed later not only made her less immune and physically weak, but also contributed to the rise of a set of fears we never knew she had. She worries more(a lot) about us(me n my sister) getting married, about us settling in our lives and about our lack of proper financial knowledge and almost about everything. She turned into this ardent worshipper and devotee of god, which she never was. Its not like she never believed in god or something like that, but she was the “my religion & my god is my business” type. She rarely did all those rituals and religious acts or fasting. Now, she is completely different. Being with mum used to be fun. And clearly, it is not any more. Now it is exhausting to be around. I think we need to find a balance somewhere in between to gain peace. Have been trying hard, but it takes out a lot of energy.
Injuries are all i had during the last few weeks. One after the other, something comes up. They barely let me follow a routine. I injured both of my knees badly. Messed up with weights and ended up having a shoulder muscle sprain. And now, it looks like my body is taking in too much heat that i cannot even open my mouth with this severe throat sore, pain and hard cough. I am literally hating my body. It has to have something or the other every time. I am sick of being the sick person. I took four sick leaves in July alone and i so badly wanted to rest today but came to office just not to waste another leave.
I know i sound pathetic for ranting only the problems i have and also ranting as if i am the only person with problems, but i could barely do a thing with all these things on my mind. I had to vent them somewhere. Sorry, it had to be the blog. 🙂 I have a lot to catch up as i have been doing everything only on mobile these days and ignoring the blogging world. But i promise i will not let anything take me down and i will stay strong and face whatever it is. 🙂
Thanks & Love