Melbourne Dairies #1

There are so many times that I started writing about Melbourne and couldn’t finish the post as i get lost in the memories it gave. Today, i atleast want to start this series. These days i keep feeling that I’m dumping all my sadness and pain into this blog but not collecting any of my good memories, the happy ones. If i keep on doing this, one day, when i look back at my blog, all I’m going to get is a recollection of sad memories. I don’t want that and so i made my mind to post atleast one happy post a week. No matter how small or big it is. So, it is a gloomy but happy post today. 😄 It is raining while i started for office. I have always loved rains. I’m a July born and being in a small town for most of my life, i have never known the ugly side of rains until i came to the city. And then, I started hating rain .. that is until i met them again in Melbourne. Melbourne is a weird city. Before going there, i have read that one can see all 4 seasons in one day. I thought it was a bit exaggerated. But no, Melbourne is that way. It will be all warm and sunny when you wake up and it will be drizzling by the time you leave for office and by lunch it will be windy and by evening the chill comes back. 😉 It is like that. And the most important thing is, the weather isn’t harsh over there. And the rains, oh water comes down too sharp unlike the rains here, but the weather becomes all too pleasant when it rains. I just loved it. Watching Fidaa after being drenched in the rain is my most wonderful memory of rain in Melbourne. I think it is an amalgamation of all the things that i loved. I love rains. I love singer Rain. I love Melbourne and i loved the movie. And those long walks in that windy weather and occasional drizzles, they are just too good. I cannot wait to go back. To me, Melbourne is love and peace. At a time in my life when all I had was pain and sadness, was depressed and low, Melbourne gave me love with all the ☀️ sunshine in the world. It gave me the courage to face the world despite how messy my life is. To smile at strangers, to talk to people again, to introspect, to write, to heal, to recover, and to just be myself, it is all Melbourne that helped me. Before 2017, if anyone had told me that cities have life too and that they mean something to people, i would’ve laughed at that dialogue. But now i realise how true it is. I know what it is like. When a place gives you love and hope for future, you will love it back. The live and vibrant Melbourne will always love anyone who loves it back. It is this introvert’s paradise. One day, i will be back in Melbourne, to be there forever. 😘😍😎☺️🙏😄.

Advertisements

The Year I Met You by Cecilia Ahern

I probably should held out a disclaimer even before writing out my thoughts about the book. It was years ago when i accidentally stumbled across a Cecilia Ahern book only to find it amazing and magical. It was later that i came to know how successful she was as an author. And i have been a fan of her ever since and instantly keep liking her books. So, i may not be fair over here as i am more of an emotional person than the logical one i always struggle or want to be. What i wanted to say was, though not completely, my liking towards her and her books may tend to show up somewhere or the other and impact my opinions. 🙂

I read the book during January blogathon and that did not leave me enough time to review the book and now, when i tried to remind myself of what i felt while reading the book, my brain came up with nothing. While i was reading the book, it was almost as if, i lived the life of Jasmine, the girl whose story the book was about and yet, i feel an emptiness in my brain when i try to recollect the memories. It was strange as i always felt or had strong and clear opinions about books once i am done reading them. But then, slowly came back all those feelings when i came across certain things or people in my own life. Like the other day, when i was told by someone that i was too close to my family and i never let anyone else come that close. I live far away from them but i never call them everyday. I rarely call and talk to my sister unless there is something that needs to be discussed or needed. But we still know how important we were to each other and my parents knew how emotional i was when it was about them. Like Jasmine in the book, i was too close to my sister and was way more protective of her than i was supposed to be. Sometimes, the book made me wonder about the relation between siblings. Why are we so attached to them? Why do we love them unconditionally? Why do we see them in a different light and why do we think that we know them better than the world? Just because we share our parents, house and some part of life, do we have to do all that? Do we have to give and take so much? The magic this relationship has never ceases to surprise me. One moment we were almost on the verge of killing each other and then in the very next moment, there comes this kindness and love that makes you forgive and forget anything that ever happened and sit down for a meal together. The author made me rethink of all those thoughts i have about my relationship with my sister and no wonder i thought i lived her life. No, my sister isn’t suffering from any kind of syndrome or disease but it was the affection, love, trust and unconditional support that made me feel home. Apart from the love for her sister, the obsession that she had for success, for work, for helping people create better things and having no life other than work are a few things that most of us see in our everyday lives. This has been a growing culture and until unless some sort of miracle happens, you just cannot stay out of that vicious circle.
I really believe when people say that things happen for a reason and that applies to bad things too. Sometimes disasters happen just to get us out of the mess we were sitting in. We just fail to see it at that moment and it only sinks in once we give it enough time. Sometimes, being busy with our lives, we think that everything’s going well and it cannot be any better. It is during these times when disaster strikes us to show us how wrong we were and what’s really wrong with the path we followed.
Our life is always a miracle and no matter what happens, we have to live with hope for the future. I really believe in this and this book says it all in a loud and clear voice.
And finally, Cecilia Ahern still has the secured place in my heart. Love her and her books. Look into her books if you find anytime. They are worth it.

This is a cheat post for the missed post yesterday and since I’m too messed up to write anything using my brain, I edited my review post from drafts and here it is.

Take Care people.

Love
Sahasra

Bad work days

Bad work days are as horrible as bad hair days or sometimes even more worse. On a bad hair day, you cam atleast forget your hair problems when there is loads of work to do. But on a bad work day you are forced to work no matter how bad it is and there’s no other way out. To me, today is one such horrible days.
This project is so messed up that even I started to feel that it is jinxed somehow. 2 consultants and 2 report developers messed it up over the past 4 months. They screwed up the beautiful POC that we created and left us with this broken one. Ha.. people!
If only there is a fairy grand mother who could help me complete this work overnight!.. okay people, you all enjoy your night. I have to get this stupid work done by tomorrow. A stupid technical glitch resulted in me to recreate everything that I have done since the last 3 days. Rework while I’m struggling to keep my eyes open. God only knows how many mistakes I’m gonna make! Wish me luck people and may you be saved from all such bad work days.
Take care.

Love
Sahasra

My name is Kim sam soon

To me, kim sam soon is this perfectly normal girl who is called fat by every k drama person and may be in the world of Koreans.
This lovely girl made me laugh, cry, feel happy and sad. It is the story of how she found her guy and the way she accepted her name. She is one amazing girl who knew what her limitations are and what she wants.
Life is never easy for this girl in the kind of world she lives. Yet, she lives. She lives life to the fullest. Gives her best and if faced with failure, she accepts it and moves ahead.
This girl is a wonderful example for me. If you have to fulfil your dreams, you have to fight head on. Never fear failure and stay behind.  Be it love or career, say it and do it of you need it. The only way one gets a thing is by asking and going for it.
I love the way this girl tells the guy that she loves him. Never once does she think that she isn’t worthy of him. I wouldn’t have respected her this much if she ever doubted herself. She has the feeling that she is fat and even does fad diets too but never once does she consider herself anybit less because of her body.
I’m in awe of this girl. She is a fictional character. But she is wonderful. I’ve seen count less k dramas and she is the best of all the leads I’ve ever seen. If I were to wish for to be any one fictional character, that would be her. I wish I was like her. Like the dough that stretches all by itself without any yeast. Independent, self reliant, yet madly in love and mostly super confident and ferocious.
Love you kim sam soon. Haven’t had a chance to do any research on the actors in the drama, but will do that soon and update the post with enough details. Do watch it if you are interested.
And, I blame sam sooni for making me stay awake till 3 in the morning today and I ended up having severe sinus based headache resulting in me indulging 3 coffees. The client almost ate my head off and found 2 more issues with my reports. I’m banging my head by the end of the day. I will have to deal with that tomorrow, so why think about it and panic now!. Anyways, today’s rule is to not post anything in hurry after 11:30 pm like I’ve been doing since the past 4 days and to move forward my sleep time to some 10:30-11:00 frame. 🙂
Hope you all had a great monday. Take care people. Good night. Bye.

Love
Sahasra

Big girl

No re, I’m not talking about myself. It is Danielle Steele’s book that I’m talking about.
13 charles Street is the first book of Steele that I got to read. I really enjoyed the book. I always liked stories about the contemporary world. Stories that aren’t too depressing nor too fictitious. No wonder I loved her book. Not sure why it took me so long to pick her book again but this one is worth the wait. Loved Big girl for many reasons. I wouldn’t give out spoilers but would just tell you why I loved this book so much that I’m going for a second read. So, here’s why this became a good read to me. 🙂
1. I’m a big girl too and the thought of reading some story related to the topic is exciting.
2. Different things happen differently in everyone’s life. Just because you have a few things in common, it doesn’t mean that you’ve seen similar life. This book gives a great example for this.
3. Just because you are born to the same parents, it doesn’t mean that you think the same or you’ll have to look the same.
4. Just because a few people in the world think that you are fat and aren’t attractive, you need not stop living your life.
5. Parents might be the most wonderful and equally dangerous breed in the world.
6. Of course, your parents love you and can only think about your goodness and wellbeing. But for sure it doesn’t mean that whatever they do is good for you.
No matter what they say, we are the one’s who should be deciding what’s good for us and what’s not.
7. Parents give you good advices and suggestions from their own life experiences. They think we can play safe by following their footsteps. But what they forget is that no two lifes are similar and one has to make his own mistakes to grow. And the things they think are good to us need not necessarily be good for real as they think with their heart and brain when it’s our own brain and heart who knows what’s best for us.
And if I keep on listing like this, I will end up writing the whole story. So, that’s it for now people. And huh, don’t hesitate to pick it up when you see it. It’s a nice and interesting read.
Take care. Bye.

Love
Sahasra

Unhappy clients

The first time I met a client was some 4 years back. It was 6 months since I started working on the reporting tool and was pretty good at it and then I was in Joberg training to be a consultant. One of the consultant was facing some technical issues on site and requested my manager for help saying that the client was not happy. It was a Friday and when on training it was almost all play with very little work. Most of the team left for the day or were at different clients.
My manager asked me if I can help. I wondered how I could help if the senior consultant couldn’t figure out the issue and told him the same. He then said that the issue might not be with the report but might be with the settings and other technical details. So I agreed to give it a try. It was a short drive but it felt like I was sitting in the car for hours, I was so nervous with a thousand questions in mind. When we reached there the situation was no good either. Of course, the consultant was already on panic mode. He worked so hard to create that beautiful report and he was being bashed with technical issues when it’s time to take all the applause. I would have panicked too if it were me in his place.
I told myself to calm down and started gathering information. It was like writing exam on a subject that you have been learning for the past 6 months. Though not an expert on the tool, I set up the tool running on 4 different machines and knew the technical setup in and out.
The strange thing that I noticed was the client wasn’t in panic mode or didn’t even seem anything near unhappy. He was the Risk manager and responded to all my questions and complied with all my requests. Tell you the truth, he didn’t get a word of what my manager was talking and I had to intervene in between. It was the first time I have talked to someone about something completely technical and they not only understood well but responded me back. That was the first time I experienced the joy of being a techie. I loved taking to the client. Did I mention that he was this tall, dark and handsome guy with the perfect attitude. 🙂 And of course, on his desk, he has pictures of a beautiful woman with a child in her arms. Sshh…my bad, you see!
Coming back to my point, after recreating the whole setup process model and debugging the existing process, we identified that there were a few war and jar files missing which caused problems in accessing the report. And once the missing things were replaced, things worked and the client was really happy with the first look. It was just a minor technical glitch that lead to the whole situation.
The work order was closed successfully after a few more visits that didn’t include me but I was more than happy. Though a small one, I did my part and that too very well. My happiness just doubled when I heard that my manager spoke very highly of me when he went back to India. If it was today’s me, it wouldn’t be a big deal but to that girl who is just 6 months old at the job, it was a great thing.
To this day, I always remember the moments of that day and those memories will stay in my heart forever. Whenever I have to face an unhappy client or clean someone’s mess, I remember that day and those memories.
To this day, client’s requirements haunt me and the thought of talking to an unhappy client terrifies me. But none of this stops me from facing them. I face them straight with a head high touching the sky and never once did I fall on my face. I always left the room with a smile or some hope.
Life isn’t easy but it is memories like these that give us hope and courage to face the everyday mess. And today I have a meeting with one such client and I am dead nervous.
I really wish everything goes well and my coffee count stays in control. 🙂
And I forced myself to bed at 11:30 which was considerably better than the usual 2:30 or 3 am times. I will have to see how well it goes for the rest of the month. And todays addition is my green tea. My cup have been begging me use it since a month and today I’m going to grant it’s humble request. 🙂
I happened to write the post early in the morning and only got a chance to edit now. The meeting went well and I was supposed to talk to her again tomorrow and finalise the solution. I really wish things go well. And I didn’t grant my cup, it’s wish! So to compensate for it, I will be pose in one asana for at least 15 minutes. Tough.. but will have to try!.

Hope you all had a great day.

Love
Sahasra

In search of the real me..

Sometimes I feel as if someone else is living my life and I’m watching all of this happen from a distance. Strange but I don’t feel like it is me. It feels like some stranger is living my life as it is in some movie.

  • The me I always knew, wasn’t this talkative and hyperactive.
  • The one I knew always read books that she bought and bought more only to read but not to store.
  • The one I knew loved watching movies on the big screen and forgot the whole world for those 3 hours.
  • This girl never liked shopping and never even thought about window shopping.
  • Was the one who saved more that she ever spent.
  • Never cared about how she looked or how the world looked at her.
  • Loved to fill all of her notebooks and dairies and scribbled every now and then.
  • Never had control over watching movies and TV shows, especially Korean.
  • Never gave up her sleep for anything in the world.
  • No matter what the problem is, I always had the courage to face it and lived with content even if I failed miserably.
  • To her, happiness meant a lot than goals, objectives, pride, ego and people.
  • This girl did wonders at work and managed to get everything done and was happy too.

I can just go on like this forever but the truth is I miss that girl too much or should I say that I no more like the girl that I’ve become. With age and time, people mature. But it looks as if I’m moving backwards. I don’t say that every single change that I listed is a bad one but some really are and they make me feel really bad. I get so irritated at the way I do certain things and start wondering what happened to me. It looks like though I don’t expect a lot from others, I expect a lot from me and you know, expectations of any kind hurt.

July is always a special month to me. I generally don’t make a big deal out of my birthday, but that’s one of the reasons why I love July. The second half of the year starts today and may be, this can be a new start to me. I want to do things that I love and take one step towards being the person that I want to be. I am going to post for every single day of the month starting today. Yes, a personal July blogathon is what I’m going to call this.

These days, I’m too tired and sleep is on my eyes ready to occupy my body but my mind doesn’t want to rest. I keep on browsing mindlessly the whole night and then go to bed at sometime around 2 or 3 am and wake up late and cranky. It affects my work, body, health, relations with people, and most importantly, my happiness. I want to change this thing that is the start to a vicious cycle. I want to sleep early and get a minimum of 7-8 hour sleep time to wake up fresh for the day.

Wish me luck and Happy July people. 🙂

Love
Sahasra